I Know Where I'm Going, It's Just Getting There.

for the last three years of my life, I've been absolutely certain what I want to be when I get out of college. I want to teach English. I'm sure most of you know this already because I talk abut it constantly.

To get to this point in my life, I've had to compromise a lot. I've grown away from the Arts, focused more on writing and English. I thought that had to be the end of my tough desicions! I was incorrect.

Because then came the issue of what college to go to. I thought I had that all figured out, but then my mother brought up the option of me staying home for the first two years and going to the extension school in town. My first reaction was no friggen way. I wanted out of thi stupid town as soon as possible. But then, after looking at my financial means, I thought that it was stupid to even think about going to a four year college right off the bat. I contemplated for weeks, and it wasn't until after I had spent over 88 dollars on other college applications and sending in my transcripts that I caved and convinced myself that transfering after two years was the most logical thing to do.

But now, after all this convincing, this wonderful blessing and curse has come from one of the schools I applied to, he school I intended to transfer to after two years. I was invited to a writing conference there, and I was given a scholarship for the poetry I wrote and submitted. I am not complaining about this at all!! I am beyond overjoyed, and so honnored, and so thankful..but now I've got a four year college in my brain again.

I want to go to this school. The biggest thing I'm worried about is the financial side of this..when I get out of school, I don't want to be up to my eyeballs in loans when I already have an insane amount of medical bills to be thinking about. I don't know what to do. My heart says one thing and my head says another. After I had to convince myself to do the opposite of what I wanted, I don't know if I can convince myself the original thing again!

I just don't know. I can't stop thinking about this. I know I'll get more fincial aid and scholarships, and grants, but I don't know how much, and I won't for at least a month. I just don't know.

I know exactly where I'm going. It's just how I'm going to get there that I don't have a clue about right now.

Well, I love you.

Taylor May

Maylor_Tay on Twitter
tay_may on instagram